Become your best self in 2020
The new year is upon us and that means a brand new opportunity to become the best versions of ourselves.
People love to use the ever popular saying “ Living my best life” but how many of us actually are?
There are some pretty awesome rules I (try my best) to live by to help me achieve my goals and truly live my best life- I want to share them with you all.
#1 Don’t do it alone.
You can’t develop in a vacuum, nor can you reach all your goals without a support system. You have to get past the discomfort of letting others in on your plans so they can support you. Build your team with love.
#2 Practice, practice, practice.
Greatness takes determination, discipline, and lots of regular practice. Think about how long it takes a baby to walk or how long it took you to learn to swim. You have to be prepared to dedicate yourself to your own development, in the same way your mother or primary caretaker dedicated herself to your care while growing up. And if she didn’t set a good example for you, it’s time to move beyond where she left off and challenge yourself to do it differently. Also, if you have children, even more reason to level up.
#3 Monitor your progress.
It is not enough to just to set the plan. You have to follow it, consistently monitoring your progress against the plan, reflecting on what is going well and where you are struggling. At the end of each month, you will need to reset your monthly plan, acknowledging your accomplishments and identifying new actions or experiences to keep you moving forward to become who you are meant to be. You got this!
#4 Talk about your successes.
Pleasurable experiences are stored in our working memory in the rational brain. For them to register, you actually have to experience them and hold them in your conscious awareness for at least 10 to 20 seconds. To the brain, if you have a pleasant experience and just move on, it’s like it never happened. The brain is wired to throw up painful or “negative” emotional memories faster and with greater frequency, which is why people complain more than they talk about their successes and joys. Refocusing your brain on pleasurable experience requires slowing yourself down and taking the time to share your experiences with others so you can build confidence, self-esteem, and optimism. It also requires you to discard that old belief that talking about your achievements is “bragging.” Speak greatness out loud and don’t dim your shine for anyone!
#5 Seek professional help.
There is such a stigma in our community when it comes to asking for help and many of us are stunted in our growth because of it. Coaching, counseling, psychotherapy are all approaches that provide a safe, nonjudgmental environment for building self-awareness and getting in touch with your emotions. This type of support can help you to identify and eliminate automatic negative thinking and patterns of behavior that get in your way. Think about seeking professional help to help you build self-awareness or to guide you to achieve the more challenging parts of your plan. If you need help, ask for it. I’m here for you as well!